I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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