I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i just pee glitter
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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