These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
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