Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
