She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
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