Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
