clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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