did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
