i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
