Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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