I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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