You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
