you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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