Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Randomize
