I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Randomize
