in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
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