brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I need a burrito and a hug.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
