I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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