I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
The beer is more important than you right now.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
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