If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
