No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
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