Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
