Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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