and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
