Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
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