i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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