Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
