you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
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