So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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