i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Randomize