He kissed a someone with a penis
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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