My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Boobs speak an international language.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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