can we get nightvision for the apartment?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
