Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize