Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
