If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
