I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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