xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I love you. Go after that dick
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
