YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
