I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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