sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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