Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Randomize
