Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
