I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
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