Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I don't deserve a penis
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
