how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
