erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
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