Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize