We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize