people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
