Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Randomize
