Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
